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Wednesday 16 January 2013

Children Aboard

James always assured me that many cruising couples took their children on circumnavigations and that the children benefitted from both the one-to-one intense education and also the more general wordly awareness their cruises gave them. Elizabeth and Matthew have been brought up on Croix des Gardes and have already endured uncomfortable passages and weeks at sea, so it was natural we should take them with us.

Elizabeth doingher schoolwaork with a touch of sophistication
The novelty was new in Cascais and there was plenty to occupy everyone in the fortnight before our race. The children were generally in good spirits with plenty of landside activities and parties to occupy them. Once we set off for Barbados, the tempo changed and they realised that they had to fit in with the more vital activities of running the boat and ensuring all was safe and well. The children behaved exceptionally and soon adjusted to a routine of schoolwork in the mornings followed by lunch, free time, some more academic work, second free time then dinner and bed.

Matthew in full meltdown
On arrival in Barbados, everything changed again. I do not know what the children expected as they won’t say, but behaviour plummeted and tempers bean to fray. This was hardly surprising after six weeks crammed together in a boat. Once Ollie and Dave left, it was Defcon 1 on board at times with either Elizabeth or Matthew suffering immense angst and blaming us for everything in floods of tears. This alternated with outbursts of extreme anger which drove us to threaten the relevant child with a passage home.

The children have also had times of great joy and excitement at our journey. They have just gone out to watch “Pirates of the Caribbean” on a big screen in Wallilabou Bay but have become distracted by a colony of bats in their ‘cinema’. Elizabeth has discovered the importance of learning foreign languages as she made friends with a young French girl on another boat whilst Matthew has been discovering self-confidence and physical prowess.

James has a small library aboard and I pulled down an edition by the Radio 4 presenter Libby Purvis and her account of sailing around Britain with her then 3 and 5 year olds. The tale is frank and comes warts and all. It is a relief to find we are not unique in having children who are angelic the one moment and whom we want to commit to care the next. Libby’s husband even offered a petition to the Social Services – “family of four living in cramped conditions in three rooms. No electrical or water services.  No bathroom. No television or contact with outside world. Children lack formal education. No provision for healthcare. Malicious isolation from friends and family.” The postscript ten years on shows that the children did indeed benefit from the voyage as hoped, and remembered all manner of small kindnesses and trivia from the event. We can but hope that ours will equally benefit.

12 comments:

  1. You are all doing very well. E&M's rebellion is natural and accentuated by intensity of close living. I too have read Libby Purvis. A A Milne said "When one gets better the other gets worse"
    I smiled at E's text - it said more than she realised! Places you visit look fabulous. NSW continues to burn while Sydney is fire free, dry and not as hot as out west. Love Hxxxx

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  3. Poor Matthew. You didn't inflict the Chilli Cabbage on him, did you?

    M - your dad gave it me once. I cried too.

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  4. honeymoon period over for E and M - behaviour normal for their age group - at least back home there are more places to disappear to - 4 of u in confined space 24/7 was always going to trigger problems - but they r great children - they will develop into stronger adults through this experience - stop worrying and enjoy the adventure. love mum xx

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  5. I am available to attend Heathrow and meet any returned children before Social Services get to them. love Dad xxxxx

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  6. Fear not, you are not alone! Every parent out there can identify and sympathise with your comments, and we don't have the restrictions that you do, with life aboard a yacht. Only this afternoon Angus went into meltdown because the dog wouldn't play to his rules under the sprinkler! The dog is far more obedient, doesn't sulk and never answers back! I think you're all doing wonderfully considering the situation and I'm sure the children will remember it all and think back on what a fantastic experience it was, and how lucky they were to have it. On Sunday we went to Bart & Eleanor's 50th party (44 + 6!!) at their place and had a very enjoyable afternoon in the garden. It was not 40 degrees that day much to the relief of all, and the proceedings were interrupted about 5ish by the arrival of a very heavy rainstorm which brought further welcome cooling. It hasn't lasted however and tomorrow is to be 39 again. Oh how we miss the Blaxland Rd pool in these temperatures! James Nye was at the Kenyons and Alexa, with husband and daughter, Lara? James is currently living on Central coast at McMasters Beach but soon off to NZ to investigate possibility of living there. Very nice chap, but a restless soul I thought.
    Thinking of you. Whoever said parenting was a tough gig wasn't kidding! Love to all, Janie xxxx

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    1. message for Angus - letter arrived - thank you for sending the lovely photo of you with your lego storage - and I must say your writing is beautiful. love Bette & Gordon xx

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  7. Hi Sarah
    It is so, so cold here in Conington but fortunately we have your blog to make us feel a bit warmer.
    You have taken us back in time to St.Vincent where we stayed at a charming place called Petit Byahaut, close to Wallilabou Bay. If you are still in the area perhaps you could enquire what happened to the place. It was owned by a West Indian cricketer (sorry I cannot remember his name, but he was a great cook).
    We are trying to think where you are going next - St. Lucia or Grenada?
    Love from both of us.

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  8. I would like to echo Helen's weather report. Have just takien the dog for a walk and it is bitterly cold!
    Gill

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  9. I think I almost wish for the cold Helen and Gill report as it has been 45.9 in Sydney today and at 10pm still 30. A little moderation would be welcome! H

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    1. Hi Hilary - have just watched the BBC news and heard of your record breaking temperatures in Sydney - hope you are OK and manage to stay cool somehow! Needless to say we are not having a problem staying cool her in UK!
      Gill

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  10. Don't let the kids get you down - it only last for the first (hmmm- how long?) 37 years!

    Pete B

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